Mailing-lists 08 May 2005

Australian BDSM Information Site

• What they are
• Where they are
• How to subscribe
• What sort of traffic can you expect
• Some australian BDSM-related mailing-lists
• Some other BDSM-related mailing-lists

When you subscribe to a mailing-list your email address gets put on a list with the addresses of other people who share the same interest. When you, or any other member of the same list, have something to say on the subject of your interest you send email to a special email address. A computer program (the mailing-list server) receives this message and automatically sends a copy of it to everyone on the list.

So, if you are on a mailing-list of people interested in, say, BDSM (wink, wink), then you can share your thoughts, ideas and problems by sending them in email to the server which then it sends a copy out to all the list members.

If anyone wants to comment or offer suggestions or advice regarding your email they do the same thing: they send an email to the server and it sends a copy to you and to all the other list members. In this way everyone shares and can support the others.

Mailing-lists have been around for more than a decade. They are one of the oldest ways computer-driven of having discussions with people that share the same interests as yourself. There are thousands of mailing-lists in operation on the Internet.

For a mailing-list to work you have to have one mailing-list server computer somewhere on the Internet to "host" the list. Some organisations "run" mailing-lists in this way for their own use, and sometimes individuals run mailing-list servers to support their own interests. There are a number of BDSM-oriented mailing-lists, which I will get to shortly. If you want to have a look at what sorts of things people have mailing-lists about you might like to try searching on Yahoo using keywords like "mailing", "lists" or "email".

Alternatively there is a web site, Liszt, the mailing-list directory, which contains pointers to hundreds (or more) mailing-lists.

Please note that mailing-list servers and, hence, the mailing-lists themselves, often come and go as the interest of the people who run the lists ebbs and fades.

Most mailing-lists also have another program which handles subscribing and unsubscribing members. You send special commands to these programs, via email again, to tell it what to do for you.

One of the most common programs that is used for doing this mailing-list administration is called Majordomo. A couple of the BDSM lists that I will mention shortly use Majordomo.

There are other lists where administration is done by a human being, and there are yet others where the person running the list (the list owner) has written his/her own special program to do it for them.

Some of the adult-oriented mailing-lists also have extra "verification" steps involved to prevent, say, someone subscribing a friend of theirs as a joke or to try and prevent minors reading things that the law says they shouldn't.

This all means that there are many different ways of subscribing to mailing-lists, but it's always relatively straight-forward. You just follow the instructions that you get as you go along and it all works (he tries to give an encouraging smile).

Once you are subscribed to a list you get an email message telling you so, and which also gives you helpful information about the list. KEEP THIS MESSAGE. It almost invariably will tell you how to unsubscribe. This is useful and will stop you having to fight with the dumb administration program.

You subscribe to a mailing-list by sending a request to the program or the person administering the list. For a mailing-list like AusBDSM (see below), which has Majordomo, you send a message to the Majordomo program--which uses a separate email address to that to which you send email for the list members--like this:

          subscribe ausbdsm

The topics discussed on mailing-lists vary enormously. Typically you will find "threads" dealing with things like:

• Telling your "vanilla" partner that you want BDSM in your relationship
• Where to find different "toys" or books
• How to handle communication problems with your Dom/sub
• Relative merits of things like nipple-piercing, different punishment methods, etc.
• Use of safe-words

• AusBDSM is an Australian-based mailing list for BDSMers here. The traffic consists of discussions of general BDSM themes, upcoming play-parties and get-togethers. Traffic can be from zero to, say, twenty messages per day, but is usually around the six or seven per day mark. There are 800+ members on this list.

  You can subscribe via the WWW page at:

  http://tertius.net.au/mailman/listinfo/ausbdsm

  For more information see http://tertius.net.au/~thorfinn/ausbdsm.html.

• The Forum is another Australian-based discussion mailing-list. Forum presents a comprehensive discussion of safe play, and erotic adult education and aims to help people gain basic and advanced knowledge and skills in a growing range of sexual health and safety issues, with strong emphasis on the BDSM and fetish scene.

  You can subscribe via the WWW page at:

  http://www.bdsm.com.au/forum/

• SydBDSM is a mailing-list for sydney-siders. It is mainly social. For information, including about subscription, see SydBDSM (http://www.egroups.com/group/SydBDSM/)

• There are two Melbourne lists. The first is the longest-established. The second is a newcomer, established to compete with the original list:

  • MelBDSM (http://www.egroups.com/group/MelBDSM/)
  • Melbourne BDSM (http://www.topica.com/lists/melbournebdsm)

• Under30SydBDSM was setup in March, 2002, to cater towards the members of our community and the newbies that are thirty years old or younger. We hold a regular munch on the first Wednesday of each month. The night usually consists of nice, cheap food, social chat and introductions so people can make a few friends. We also hold other events throughout the year including things like Ice Skating, Bowling, Paintball, etc. (social occasions) and advertise to the list when we are attending play parties, etc., in case anyone wants to come along. Plans are to hopefully get a few play parties, and educational things going soon too.

  Subscription can be made via under30sydbdsm-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.au.

• C-BDSM is a mailing-list for canberrans. For information, including about subscription, see C-BDSM (http://www.egroups.com/group/C-BDSM/)

• BadGrrls - for women (lesbian, dyke, bisexual, transgender, transexual, f2m, m2f) who do (or want to do) bdsm with other women. Primarily Australian focus and membership. To subscribe, either visit the web site http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BadGrrls/ or send a blank email to BadGrrls-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

• GoreanWhispers is a partially-Australian list for those into the Gorean (ala' John Norman) lifestyle or ethos. You don't have to actually be Gorean to be on the list, but the conversation revolves around all things Gor.

  See GoreanWhispers.

• Gor Australia is the local email discussion group for the Australian Gorean community - for those living the philosophies and cultural aspects of Gor offline or are interested in learning more.

  See Gor Australia for details.

• MDOM is an American-based list for male Doms and female subs. Membership is unknown, but traffic is around 30 messages per day.

  You can join up via the DsKiosk page.